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Thursday morning Ramblings

28 Sep

September has been one of the strangest months I have ever had. It started out on a high note. Labor Day weekend. We introduced the new owners to the campers in the park. We raffled off the Childrens Library quilt. We had a musical concert. The park was full. Really great all the way around.

Then, the seasonals began grumbling. They don’t like what is happening with the park. They  are going somewhere else. This is fine until I find out that they are talking to people in the town about this. Anyone who knows about small town life, this is a huge mistake. I have been guilty about talking about business rumors and will not do it anymore. Just the other day a camper came in and told me she had heard that the new owners were raising the prices so much that all the seasonals were leaving. (So not true) This man who was telling the story was from Texas and this camper heard him talking about it in a local store. You can imagine how mad I was when I heard this. But, it was also a turning point for me. It’s time to let go of the park. We had to deal with rumors and seasonals when we bought the park and deal with a severe drought and the West Peak fire. The new owners will be able to handle all of this too.

I also started going to Nail Tech school in August 4 days a week in Pueblo. Getting up at 5 am and home around 1, a quick nap then working in the office. I so enjoyed doing this. #1 It was an escape for me from all the park nonsense. #2 I loved the students. Beautiful high school girls and 1 guy who walked an hour a day just to get to school. I enjoyed listening to their lives as we practiced on each others nails and toenails. And…it was going to be great little career in La Veta and Texas. The only issue was the instructor who was passive/aggressive and very short with us when it came to asking questions or asking for help. I was a big girl and tried to not let it get to me but it certainly pushed a lot of buttons. Two weeks ago, I woke up with a hemmorhaged eye. After a trip to the ER Denny drove me to school because I had 2 appointments at 8 and 9. During the 9 am manicure, I was shaking a bottle of polish and it flew out of my hand and spilled all over the floor. Normally, I would have laughed and took care of it. But..when I told the instructor what happend, “hoping there was a mop or something”, she yelled “you better get it cleaned up”. I asked how and again she yelled “a rag and polish remover”. Now I’m on my hands and knees scrubbing th floor for 10 minutes while my client is waiting for her manicure. I was mortified and embarrassed. The room was full of clients and the instructor sat at her desk rather than help me with this mess. After I went home I began thinking about the whole episode and really got upset. Denny and I talked and thought the best thing to do was to drop the class because it was not worth this type of treatment. (I was not the only one being treated this way.) I went to the college and talked to numerous staff including the Dean. I did all that was asked of me and yesterday I was told I would receive a total refund. I’m glad I stayed with it because I went through so many emotions after emailing the instructor and trying not to think that they were all making fun of me or that I was making something out of nothing. That’s how one is made to feel when they have been humilitated and the stand up for themselves.

Next incident was that the sale of the park fell through. Oh my God.  This happens 2 days after the school incident. Denny and I just looked at each other and said, “well I guess we are working next year!” Thankfully the sale of the park was back on that next Thursday, but another emotional week. We are now busy with the last few weeks of the park which is surprisingly our busiest. Looking forward to my quilt retreat next week and Oktoberfest.

Now comes the special parts of these last few weeks. Coming into the office and finding painted rocks with Love, Hope Courage painted by a friend who had stayed with us all summer. Coming into the office and a camper who I didn’t know leaving me a bracelet made out of dried potatoes. Very cool. Hearing from my classmates on a day that I was actually crying over what had happened at school and them telling me how much they missed me and wanted me to come back. Going to church and feeling desperate and leaving feeling strong. The message was “be still, I am with you”. The presence of God in my life this entire season has been the strongest I have ever felt but more so in September. There was a lady who I called to talk about these park issues and she told me her story and then said she would be on her knees for me that night. The next day another scary issue we had happened was resolved. We have received so may nice cards, comments and kind goodbyes that it can be overwhelming.

Be still, let go of the park, enjoy life, love each other, respect each other, be kind to each other. In a few weeks we are driving to California. I will be attending a spiritual retreat to soothe my soul and heart and brain. I can’t wait. Denny will be treating his golf game and reading. We don’t close until Dec. 7 and off to Texas we will go. We really like the new owners and it will be exciting to see their new adventure happen.

I also really want to go to Puerto Rico and help rebuild in the future. I am so sad about what has happened and the lack of transportation to get supplies. When I was first in Junior College I was going to be a spanish speaking nurse and move to Puerto Rico. Unfortunately alcohol, drugs and boys detered from that dream, but maybe I can go and be helpful.




Tuesday, Aug 8 2017

8 Aug

Just home from AA meeting and now settled in for my guilty pleasure show of Dance Moms. I cannot believe that I have watched this show for like 7 years. I really like watching the dancing. I think I wish I would have taken dance classes. It is so boring to go to dances and Denny and I sit there looking like a couple of doe doe birds. One can’t do everything even though I do try.
Lots of stuff going on. Some of you may know this but we are in the process of selling the RV park. So far everything is on schedule to close on December 7. We have also bought a home here in La Veta. For those of you who visited us when we lived here before, we are now just around the bend from there. We have 360 degree view of the mountains. I will try to take some photos this weekend. So….on top of working Denny has been making some repairs and we can now talk about new owners coming in next year to our campers. It is rather bittersweet. We have made friends with many of our customers but I think we can stay in touch. I definitely need to make some new business cards to be passing out.
Now for my next news. I am desperately trying to get into Manicure/Nail Tech school in Pueblo. I actually have a job, a salon and clientale for next summer. I will know Monday if I can get into the program so trying to stay calm about it until then. If it doesn’t work out, then I’m going to go online with my sewing/embroidery business. We shall see!!
Tomorrow Jessica and her family will be coming in with her family for a couple of days of dirt biking. I hope the rain holds off some so everything won’t be so slippery. The monsoons have been nice but it definitely cuts into afternoon outings for the campers. I have never seen big trees grow so much. The limbs just keep getting bigger and bigger and hanging lower to the ground.
Our friends Jerry and Deb are coming in Saturday from Illinois to hang out for a few days and then on Tuesday we’ll all go to Denver to play in the annual Swinging for AIDS golf tournament. It will be fun to see them but since Dale and Terry are gone we won’t be able to do much running around but we hope to golf and go to Alys for dinner on Sunday night.I have a new golf swing that is really making my shots much better. It’s called the “Vicky Tit Squeeze” swing. Deb’s friend used to swing that way and since she has passed away we will honor her by naming the swing after her. :))
Tomorrow will be a fun day. My friend Karen and I are going to a Batik class. I plan on doing a Kolam which is an Indian design. Can’t wait to do it.
I am making these placemats for a silent auction and no have orders for 14 more. I am on a desperate hunt to find the fabric since I need lots of yards. I have spent hours online searching for it and have only come up with 1 1/2 yards. Yikes.

I am loving our perennial garden. It has been so rainy that it has flourished. I must go outside and actually sketch it out and do a painting!! I must!!
Business has been superb and still pretty busy. We still have full weekends but not so much during the week. I had a mother/daughter from France in last night who were tent camping around the country! It has been amazing to have campers from all over the world in these last five years. My shop is pretty busy. The new favorites are my colorful tee towels and hand towels and of course the bowl holders. I just ordered some sweatshirts as it is beginning to cool off and it will be time to have some of those embroidered.
I think that is it for now. Have missed writing. I also need to print out all of my posts beginning in 2011 I think. One of the things to do before we move. I also printed out a list of 116 things to throw away. That might help with my sorting.
Peace everyone

2 for 0 regarding Scary Movies

14 Jun

Mitzi and I are struggling with getting to a good scary movie. We went to see “It comes at Night”. We never did figure out what came at night, never figured out where the disease came from and never did jump once!! We judge the movies on jumps. It was still a fun trip to Pueblo anyway.

Pat and John came by for a quick visit during their Colorado travels. They are our buddies from Brownsville. They are the strongest couple I know. Their daughter and granddaughter were the women killed in the balloon accident last July. Pat did say she received lots of calls from state politicians regarding the accident and changes in Balloon Safety regulations. Its all about the FAA taking some steps. Always fun to see them and they were happy to be out of the awful Texas heat. It has been warm here but not overwhelming. Denny has the swamp cooler running, (l love living somewhere that we need a swamp cooler!)

Today was day 3 of recovering from cow rustling injury Saturday night. It was kind of funny. We had a motorcyclist come in around 9 pm. He said “I needed to get off the highway so I wouldn’t hit a deer. So he drove through La Veta and immediately had 3 deer walk in front of him. Next I hear this really loud cowbell in the park. The motorcyclist came and got me and said “I think there is a moose in the park”. Not likely but there was a cow!! It had a harness and rope attached. I’m thinking I’m holding to a big dog but in reality it was a 1000 lb animal. She didn’t like being held and jerked me clear off of my feet. OUCH!! I felt my brain rattle immediately. There were some cowboys in the park and I discovered this is like a cowboy injury and that I was whiplashed. Felt very out of it on Sunday and when I couldn’t figure out my reservations on Monday and was crying, I thought I better get to the ER. Let’s mark this up to another of my very weird injuries. My brain feels less foggy today but I am trying not to  overdo thinking. 🙂 Luckily Terry worked today so I had a computer break. Did you know that to recover from a concussion you must rest, stay off of the computer and computer games, not watch a bunch of tv and not go outside with out sunglasses on. Therefore I have not played Candy Crush Soda since Sunday!!!!!It’s all about keeping your brain unstimulated. Denny has kept a good eye on me and has been great. I can’t believe he checked in 19 campers while I was at the emergency room!!

I am missing one of my wigs. We can’t find it anywhere. I’m bad about falling asleep on the divan and taking it off, but it is usually easy to find. Tomorrow we’ll look under the divans and hoping one of the dogs didn’t hide it! PS. the wig was found crammed behind our head board. Can’t blame that on the dogs.

I must say the rv business is seriously booming. We have already been full several days and that doesn’t usually happen until July. Lots of tenters this year and Baby and Yuki have been very busy. Campers from all over the world. Soooo cool.

As usual I’m way behind in sewing projects but may get caught up in a few days? We will beginning out fundraising for our local library and the children’s program. My friend Carol finished the Amy Bradley camping quilt and it is so bright and fun. We are taking donations for: $1, 6 tickets for $5, 12 for $10 and 25 tickets for $20 and so on. Call me or send donation to PO Box 122, La Veta, CO  81055


Curious about how gun laws may change now that a Representative has been shot. That would be sad if it took actually attack on politicians to actually make a change.

Finally was able to play one round of Mahjong. I had a couple of friends come down and play last week. Now we have to wait for everyone to arrive for the summer to have a regular weekly session.

Tomorrow we’ll have our first sewing Thursday. I think I’ll have a few ladies attend. If not I’ll have plenty of projects to do.

Struggling with a few people issues but guess what. After a vent or 2 I just tell myself “nope” and the obsessive thought goes away. I’m not saying I don’t have to say it a few times maybe a day, but it is working. Praying and turning issues over really does seem to be working. Pretty soon I’ll be able to tell how powerful Miracle Morning really is!!!!! But I can’t say anything yet,

I hope everyone has a good week! Peace

June 4, 2017

4 Jun

It’s a nice Sunday afternoon.  I started my day by going to church. It was special because one of my girlfriends grandson was baptized.  He was so cute splashing the baptismal water with his hands. I also saw my dear friend Marilyn for the first time since her husband Bob died. We loved him so much and our special memory was when he went to Gulfport on a church mission trip and was able to do everything from plumbing to sheetrocking.

It was a perfect day for walking. I am ready to go back to my Miracle Mornings. I can’t believe how different I feel not doing that. I’m achy, lethargic, yucky feeling. I’m playing my internet games too much and wasting time that I don’t really have to waste.  We have 3 groups coming in back to back in the next week and a half. For me this means making sure I have packets ready and updated, a newsletter, plus sewing bowlholders, baking potato warmers, tortilla warmers, embroidering, etc. So chip chop chip I say to myself!!

Made a quick trip to Arkansas by way of Topeka and back. Thankfully I was able to take a roomette both ways so I didn’t feel totally run down. The train was packed both ways so let’s hope they don’t discontinue Amtrak. Interesting happening on the way home. About 6:30 am on Friday morning they were calling for medical personnel to the dining car. Wasn’t sure what was going on but it sounded serious. (Sometimes it means they are arresting someone for smoking or being disruptive or that someone is ill.) About an hour later I went to the dining car for breakfast. I sat next to the lady who actually revived the man in the dining car who had a heart attack and was DEAD!! She was calmly eating breakfast with her kids like it was no biggy! I think she did receive a free breakfast but I’m hoping she will get a free train ride!!! Wow.

She was a nurse practitioner and was very helpful to me regarding some questions about my Mom. The one thing I have got to do is put my Mom in God’s hands and let it all be. It doesn’t really matter what my input is anyway. I don’t know what all is wrong with her and all I want is her to be able to have peaceful days, sleep as much as she wants and not have the urge to go to the bathroom so much. It always takes me a few days to get emotionally back on track when I get back from seeing her. We had a good visit but almost fell to the ground trying to get her off of the commode which was horrifying. That part of helping her now is out of the picture since the facility nurse asked all of us to stop helping her with her bathroom needs. We’ll see how the next few weeks play out but each day I will put her in God’s hands.

Enjoyed seeing Billie and Gkids. We actually had a fun evening of hamburgers and playing air hockey and pool and pinball machines. Sadly Kyler’s bicycle was stolen from the pool a couple of days ago. Denny called the bike shop and bought him another right away because it is very important and good for him to have a bicycle. He also has a super strong lock so that will be impossible to cut hopefully.

Wondering why son KC isn’t talking to me. Always have to deal with that emotion during the Topeka visit. Jeez.

That’s it for now.

Let’s talk aging

31 May

I get to take one month off of my reservation book. Whoo Hoo..  What a great month it was despite some weather issues. New campers, returning campers and great to see them all. We are becoming known nationwide. Many campers come in and tell us in their travels how they will mention they are coming to Circle the Wagons and then that other person will say “we’ve stayed there!!” Very exciting.

I’m winding up my trip to Arkansas. Mom is so-so. It’s really sad because she really doesn’t feel well. Her little body is becoming misshapen with being bent over. I so admire that she can still push up from her chair to her walker but it takes all of her energy. She is unhappy and is so ready for it all to be over, but she has a beating heart and nothing seriously wrong so she keeps waking up everyday. They take very good care of her at Green Acres. Today was uncomfortable for me because outside of my Mom’s room there was a lady shrieking at the top of her lungs. Very loud and high pitched and it sounded like one of those old sanitarium movies where the patients make strange noises.  I didn’t like it all. Luckily I don’t think Mom can hear her. Of course all of this gets me going on aging and how much I don’t want to end up like many of the patients who are very far into alzheimers and dementia. They wander, they carry little dolls as their babies, they think family is coming to get them, they think they are going to work, they sometimes wait at the door to hopefully escape when someone comes into the facility. It’s all heartbreaking and what is the point??? Colorado has the law about end of life. Some friends and I were discussing different ideas regarding life situations. They said they had it all written out about not wanting to be on ventilators etc. But what if you are like my Mom. During the early part of the day she is very on top of what is going on but it fades away as the day goes on. There are no choices for those like Mom. If you do have a directive regarding your end of life, do you have to take care of your plan before you are too far gone and you forget that you were not going to live in a demented way?? I watched a show that interviewed people who were taking the pills to pass away. They were still lucid but had terminal diseases, so they took care of it while they still could know what was happening. If I went to the doctor and received the diagnosis of Alzheimers, would I really be brave enough to get the paperwork done to end my life? Some days I feel braver about that decision than others. The same with a terminal cancer diagnosis, COPD, serious heart condition. I don’t like to think about it but as I enter my 65th year in January, it becomes much more of a reality of things that could happen. I then get freaked out about it being a suicide and but is that really the same because you are truly taking care of yourself and not letting yourself become a burden.

I don’t know. Hopefully I won’t have to make these kind of decisions, but it is certainly part of many conversations I’ve had this year. I love my Mom but I don’t want to see her suffer each day. We hope she may be able to be in hospice and maybe they can make her more comfortable but it is a Catch 22 situation and right now she doesn’t qualify. I would really like some prayers for her to be more comfortable and peaceful. Thank you.

I will drive back to Topeka tomorrow and hook up with my friend Becky and then have dinner with Billie and the kids. I think Billie is taking me to the 12:30am train Friday morning. I’m so glad I will have a roomette for the trip home. I need to be well rested since I’ll have to go right to work when I get back to the park. Denny and I did well keep track of reservations on both ends. He is a sweety to let me take this quick trip.

That’s it for now.  Peace

MMMMMM…..Tai Chi

13 May


Just home from my first try at Tai Chi. A visual, mental, balancing, relaxing, using earth’s energy to move exercise. It sounds deep and I will never be a Master but it’s another way of strengthening my body and mind as this aging process catches up to me. It is easy for me to visualize many of the concepts which helps, but also applying some of the movements to everyday life will be interesting. I know it looks like I am taking on a lot of activities this year, but my goal is to begin this season in a healthier way. Usually by Memorial Day I am all about caffeine, Pepsi, sugar and that continues through October. I don’t want to do that again, so trying these other options I hope will keep me energized. We shall see.

Last weekend was my month of Miracle Morning, facial routine and exercising. Due to the possibility of flooding and Denny being away, etc. I used that as an excuse to drink Pepsi, not get up early and no reading. Guess what, by Friday I felt like shit. Unmotivated, unfocused, bloated, playing my Iphone games. I missed my sense of well being and productiveness. So…this morning I was up 6:15. Rode my exercise bike, read my Circle of Prayer book and another chapter of one of Gary Bridges books. I’m looking forward to reading his other books. They are all set in our area and that makes it fun. I will continue one more month of the facial routine and we’ll see if there is significant  improvement of my flaws! There are no more Pepsi’s in the house and I know not to carry Pepsi for our little refrigerator of pop that we sell. Maybe some of Tai Chi’s chakras will take some of these crazy cravings that I have away.

It was an interesting week regarding the threat of flooding in our area. THANKFULLY our park did not flood. I do believe the original builders of this park engineered it so the river would not flood. This would have the storm that would have done it. Many other areas up and down river did flood. The river was very exciting to watch though. Huge rapids, very loud roar, and it was soooo fast. Some of you have been here and you know that it is really a creek and very shallow.

Mother’s Day weekend. I actually feel pretty good this Mother’s Day. Believe me, there have been many that I actually have gone into some depressions over. But…I’m done with the feelings of what ifs, what could have been, if I would have done this or that, etc.  My kids are now 40 and 35 and are living their lives. Since Billie was 1, she traveled the journey of divorces, alcoholism, recovering, saw things she shouldn’t have, heard things she shouldn’t have with me. Do I wish I had made intelligent choices instead of risky choices? You bet. The saddest part of all of those decisions was when I lost custody of KC for a few years. Talk about failure as a mother. (I was able to have custody again after I was sober) But…. did I know that I was suffering from depression, self-medicating with drugs and alcohol, running from mistakes, moving hoping it would fix something, changing jobs because I was upset, getting hyper and making decisions in a manic mode. There was a lot I didn’t know but I realize now. Thankfully the kids were able to see me sober from the time I was 33 on. Was I perfect because I sobered up? Far from it but there were no drugs, cigarettes or alcohol in the home. This year feels like a Happy Mother’s day. Not so much for my own mom. She is 97 and is tired of being on this earth. It’s a helpless feeling because she is fairly healthy. Her heart keeps beating, her mind is still working but she is weak when it comes to getting around. What does one say to her? The last time I saw her when my brother was sick,   I said “I know you are tired and want to go, but give me a day’s notice!”. She laughed. I can always make her laugh. I may fly and see her for a quick trip. I hope she can feel somewhat happy on Mother’s Day this year?

Busy day today finishing some bowl holder orders and a pillowcase. My friend Judy is in town and we are going to drive Taos for the day. May have to hit the quilt shop there but I have made a vague promise not to purchase any fabric. We’ll see. Business really picks up next weekend and then is non stop until October. Whoo Hoo!

That’s it for now. Peace and relax.


I’m a Hummingbird

7 May


The Happiness Quilt

It is a warm overcast morning. Rain due this afternoon. I’m glad because all of my sewing projects are in the cabin right now and if it rains I can hang out over there. My friend Alicia from Topeka, spent 3 days with me and we sewed for 2 days in the cabin. It was so fun and I was able to get through the hard part of my paper piecing quilt. She and I met last year in Holton, KS at a retreat. We hit it off immediately and now will be good friends. She is a lot like me, not afraid to take on new fabric and art lessons. She says we are like hummingbirds. We do a little bit here and little bit there. I like that analogy. We were able to show her the finer things of La Veta-The Dog Bar, downtown, the beautiful snow covered mountains. She met Ricky Tims and Justin, Beth and Jonathon. What’s really funny is she is trying her hand at artistic quilts and she shows me a photo of a book she uses and it was Judith Baker Montano. I go “Hello, she lives right here in La Veta and I know her”!!!  She about had a stroke. I love little serendipity things like that. Here is another one. We were purchasing some items from Ricky and were with Heather and Justin at the shop. Heather says she’s out of printer ink. I ask what kind and I tell her I have several inkjets that will work. I was able to sell all of the inkjets that I could no longer use and that is a chunk of change.

Mitzi and I traveled to Pueblo for our first scary movie of the summer and it turned out to be that Phoenix something movie. It was about possible UFO sightings 20 years ago and 3 teenagers that went missing trying to find out if it was true. Now, I guess the story is true about the sightings but not sure if it was true about the kids. It was not scary but interesting but there is a WHOLE BUNCH of scary movies coming this summer.

Hooked up with my Ginny buddy and it is always great to get reconnected with everyone in the summer again. Now that we have met so many new friends in Texas and back here, I truly do feel we have 2 homes. Now if we could just remember to stop sending our Amazon orders to Brownsville we’ll be back on track.

I’ll be a bachelorette again this week for a couple of days. Denny and John are going to Topeka to check out the Evil Knieval museum at the Historic Harley Davidson. John is from Evil’s hometown so this will be really fun for them.

I watched the “Lion” dvd this week. What an incredible India story. Loved it. It wound me up again about my mission ideas which are about to start up. Let me know if you would like to help with any of them.

  #1. I need 50 dolls, little ones and 50 little rubber balls. These will be for the Kolli Hills clinic which services a village of women and children affected by the HIV/AIDS crisis. Dr Samuels thought it would be nice to have these items for the children when they come to clinic once a month for nutrition and medication.

 #2.  We would like lipstick, eyeliner pencils to give to the mothers as a feel good gift. These will be for Kolli Hills also. You can call me at 719-989-0614 or text that too or

I hope to have a talk here at Circle the Wagons this summer about India and my missions there.  Someone asked me why India and not here in the U.S.  I do mission projects here in the U.S. but we must remember we are all part of this one world. Namakkal is a village in Southern India. Kollie HIlls is up the mountains from there, very remote. These places no one knows about. Dr. Samuels  Don Messer works hours and have for years to help these villages during the first outbreak of HIV/AIDS when it was epidemic. They and those who support these missions are now trying to help them sustain the funds for nutrition and medication which will go on forever. It is a wonderful and loving part of India. I hope you will join me in helping these villages. Maybe you can go with me with I return there.

That’s it for now. Peace and lovekollij

Kolli Hills families