A Yanni evening

28 Feb

I just downloaded about 5 Yanni from his Live at the Acropolis album. Kind of a good night for that. Feeling very tired, a little homesick, missing Denny and the puppies, reflecting on how crazy life has been since October 30. Feel like I’ve handled it all pretty well but also see that I’ve been a bit on the manic side of it all. Tonight feeling relieved that my friend Robin and I were able to get all of my sweatshirts except for 2 on her 6 thread machine. I was on my feet all day. I do think the medicine for my back is finally taking affect or effect? That is a huge load off of my mind. I also cut out bunches of batting and squares for micro bowl holders, went and saw Mom, and finally home around 6:30 and still had to make dinner with intentions of going to the basement to sew, but now at 10:14 I see that isn’t going to happen. I have been up til 1 every night and getting up at 8 and I think tonight I’ll try to get to bed a little earlier.
Listening to Yanni has taken me back about 23 years or more. I remember when I sobered up, many of us were into New Age and meditating and trying to change our lives and it seems Yanni was a big part of that, at least for me. Read an interesting article in Readers Digest about the many groups out there other than AA that people use to work on their drinking problems. What was interesting is that none of the groups make you actually quit drinking, mainly control it and that the main reason those same people didn’t go to AA was because of the religious aspect of it and the use of the word God or higher power. Personally, I had already tried to control my drinking many times to no avail. To this day which is now 27 1/2 years later, I can still remember the last few months of my drinking like it was yesterday. The misery, the fear, the hopelessness, the regrets, the night sweats, the hallucinations, the blackouts, the loss of feeling in my hands, my daughter laying on top of me trying to wake me up while I was passed out, my daughter making me macaroni and cheese at age 7 because I was too hung-over to get out of bed, the shame. Good luck to those who think they can control it and drink sensibly with those groups, but I for one was very glad that God was in the picture and that he led me down the right road when I came to my crossroads.
Denny has been busy with Judy and Susan in Llano mapping out bicycle routes for next years trip. Now the dilemma is if Judy and Susan will be able to head home tomorrow or wait out the storm. It looks like a nasty one. We are in a storm warning beginning tomorrow afternoon until midnight Sunday. Freezing rain which means I will be stuck at least for 2 days because the temps will stay below freezing. I’m all stocked up food so should be fine. Tomorrow it is supposed to be 61 and I told Mom we take a little walk outside.
Prayers for our friends who are undergoing cancer treatments, prayers for Matt, and prayers for Sydney who is going home!! She’ll have to be very careful to not catch anything. What the young little body has been through…..


2 Responses to “A Yanni evening”

  1. Carl 03/01/2014 at 12:24 am #

    Jay, I admire you for your ability to drive thru those dark times, be able to talk about it, and turn out to be the neat person you are today. Keep on keeping on!

  2. margie costello 03/01/2014 at 9:03 am #

    You amaze me Jay, and you always have, you have strength and determination, a willingness to share your journey so others can learn from you, and an amazing of sense of humor that keeps me in stitches! Bless your heart for being you 🙂

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