Taking the night off

31 Jan

Because of my feet and my back I thought it would be nice to just sit with a heating pad on may back, watch tv and play computer games. I have a zillion things to do over at the clubhouse but I think I can still get things done when the weather turns bad on Sunday. It was a stunning day today and we did play 18 holes. Supposed to be that way tomorrow too so will probably play again. Is it a good idea to play again? Probably not, but you know what? I’m so sick of this foot pain and back issue that at least it takes my mind off of it for a while. This morning I actually started my day off in tears because my foot hurt so bad the first step I took. I’m trying to hold off on a cortisone shot because I would like one before I go to Cuba but may not be able to wait that long.
This brings to mind that 10 years ago tomorrow was my life changing snow mobile accident that I still suffer from the affects from. Months of therapy, months of not even being able to bend over without holding my sternum because it hurt so bad to bend over, neck pain that was so crippling broken ribs that is such a painful injury and fighting depression from the whole ordeal. From being someone who could do anything physically that she wanted to do who has turned into someone who can’t even walk a block with my puppies. Not that the feet issue is from the accident but my life turned into a series of chronic issues, 3 neck surgeries, one dislocated shoulder, one shoulder surgery, a foot surgery and many issues with my back and my legs and now the feet shit. Most people get plantar fasciitis and it goes away in a couple of months with the help of inserts, etc. and mine turns into a chronic problem that is the worst thing I have experienced. I know, I know, everyone has something going on with their bodies at our age but I just really have a hard time accepting it. I am even considering medical marijuana when I get back to Colorado just to see if it helps something. As they say, “it’s my new normal” and I hate it. That’s just me today. I always try to think of someone who is suffering more and right now that person is Sydney who is probably going through something I will never fathom how bad it must feel.
I guess the bottom line is that I am feeling every bit of 61.


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